Welcome to June everybody and this month’s ever-exciting Barbie Death Village newsletter.  I know we’re still four days away, but I wanted to give everyone who hasn’t paid their dues plenty of time to get them in before they go up on June 1^st.  I’ll touch on more of that later.  We are now entering the “getting serious about TTITD” mode so I will get right to the point.  Well, right after this which I don’t recall if I’ve shared it before.  Basically it say how great Barbie Death Camp is, but we know that already.  Enjoy!

 

 

There are two main topics that I want to begin with, tickets and placement within the Village.  Let’s start with tickets.  As of this writing we have requests for 38 tickets and 13 vehicle passes.  We are currently coming up short on both for our fellow Barbiebarians.  If you have an extra ticket and/or vehicle pass and have not as of yet let Chris Haworth know that they’re available, please do it today.  I would strongly suggest you get into S.T.E.P. and if that fails, the OMG sale in August is also an alternative.  But wait, there’s another option:  if you can manage to take The Burner Express on Saturday you can sign up for their package which includes bus fare ($80+ depending upon time and location of pick up), free Work Access Pass (formally Early Entry, more on that upcoming),and a $425 ticket!  There will be up to 1000 of these ticket packages for sale, so if you’re coming in from the East Coast, like Hottie and Danielle, or overseas, like the Irish Lads, this may be your best option.  Packages go on sale Wednesday, June 14 and the link with all of the important information is below.  If you take this option and need help hauling out your water, the camp will make arrangements to have 10 gallons (four 2.5 gallon “suitcases”) of water per person available.  This offer is only for those using the Express Ticket option.

 

 

Now about placement.  Julia has agreed to take on this task and for that we say “Thank You!”  If you know which sub-camp you want to be placed in already you need to let her know.  Also how much space you reasonably need.  Some of the various sub-camps include Barbie Day Spa, A Playa Home Companion, 13^th Barbie,Kangaroo Court, Cantina Vida, Swamp Yankees, Clan O’Crash, Rocket Pad, Pizza Cats, We Got This, Hookers & Makers, ElectriCity, The Cocos Locos, Loose Nutz and a whole host of camps whose names I cannot print here because, well, this is a family publication.  All requests for sub-camps or getting your previous space back should be submitted to Julia no later than July 1.  Keep in mind we cannot mark 200+ camp spots so if you don’t group yourselves Julia will do it for you.  Priority for street-frontage goes to public-participation camps and mutant vehicles.  Street fronts should be friendly and open to visitors, well lit, and have no on-street vehicle parking.  And as always, the sacred precincts of Arson Circle will expand as necessary.  Barbie Death Camp & Wine Bistro and the Barbie“art” will have the front corner of the Village as usual.  We are requesting the same general area as last year (6:30 and E, stretching all the way to G) but there’s no guarantee that the BMOrg will honor that request.  We can be fairly certain we’ll have the same amount of space, just over four acres of prime playa real estate.

 

Let’s get dues out of the way.  Until Thursday, June 1 they are $100 for veterans and $150 for both newbies and those of you coming from overseas.  After the first they go up for everybody by another $50.  Please use our preferred method of payment PayPal using the regualr go-to addy or you can snail mail them to Doc.

 

I am happy to report we can check a major item off our list of things that the camp needs:  a piano.  Jon was able to secure a nice one off of Craigslist and it will be a welcome addition to Barbie Death Camp.  We also have a lead on a piano tuner on the playa, but still if anyone knows of one that would be willing to help us out on playa, please invite them along.  Can’t have too many piano tuners in our sphere of influence.  But in that regard, I want to thank Greg, AKA Spacer, from Simi Valley and his lovely wife Theresa for helping us out.

 

Speaking about things that we need, our sofas have to be replaced.  Because of the extremely wet winter we had there was no practical way to keep them dry, though Felony certainly gave it the ol’ college try.  I have no problem scouring Craigslist over the summer to replace our sofas.  But we need to have the small silver trailer towed and kept somewhere on the I-80 corridor, say between Sacramento and Applegate, so when we procure our sofas we have someplace convenient and comparatively close to store them.  Once we get back from TTITD the trailer can be returned to Felony’s in Placerville.  Please, can anybody offer up a little space for a few months?  Pretty please?

 

We have received word from the BMOrg that “Early Arrival Passes” are no more.  That are now called WAPs, which stands for Worker Access Pass.  This is to let people know in no uncertain terms that if you arrive early you are expected to work.  Our camp, in full compliance with the wishes of the BMOrg, are in complete agreement:  If you are awarded a WAP you will be put to work. Some of the issues we face include putting up the shade structures (seven 10’ X 20’ carports), building our shower, laying out and duct-taping together 2000 square feet of carpet in the main camp, arranging the Barbie “art”, hauling out the sofas and piano off of the trailers, running and getting me a beer, stringing the lights in the main camp, and many other menial and pointless tasks.  Check our Volunteer Spot for which tasks need to be undertaken and if you don’t have a link, contact Vulture Chow and she will hook you up.   We do have several dozen Friday and Saturday passes still available to anybody who absolutely needs one.

 

As you hopefully are aware, everyone who is granted placement in our Village is expected—nay, required—to contribute their time and labor to the general welfare of our campmates.  As previously mentioned Vulture Chow is in charge of the Volunteer Spot and this is where you will find what tasks need to be filled.  After looking over the list we are coming up miserably short in several areas.  I will highlight them by the day and ask that everyone sign up for several tasks. Most of them are fun, include alcohol and food, and aren’t necessarily very taxing.  Please sign up today.

 

SUNDAY: 7 p.m. Decorate the art cars (0 of 10 signed up)

MONDAY: 5 p.m.  Chili cooks (3 of 20 signed up, and we really do need chili cooks)

TUESDAY:  8 a.m. MOOP Patrol (1 of 10 signed up)

TUESDAY:  8 p.m.  Greeters Shift (11 of 42 signed up)

TUESDAY:  11 p.m. Taco Tuesday set-up (1 of 10), also need chicken, cooks and servers, and most everything else!

WEDNESDAY:  All morning Naked Bike Ride & Pub Crawl we need grapes, snacks, servers, etc.  And you don’t even have to get naked.

THURSDAY: 8 a.m. MOOP Patrol (2 of 10 signed up)

FRIDAY:  8 a.m. MOOP Patrol (0 of 10 signed up)

SATURDAY:  9 a.m. Pancake Pork-out bacon (4 of 20), butter/syrup, griddles (0 of 4), bartenders/servers (0 of 7), chefs (4 of 10)

 

And keep in mind, this is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg.  So let’s not go Titanic on Barbie Death Village and sign up today.

I sent out the link a few days ago for our shirts and hats, but here it is again, just in case.    This is the only fundraiser that Barbie Death Village has so please, order a shirt or hat, m’kay?  The link is below:

 

For those of you who can navigate the internet, our website is http://barbiedeathcamp.com or like us on FBhttps://facebook.com/barbiedeathvillage .

 

 

The Man burns in 96 days )’(

 

Respectfully submitted,

 

Doc Pyro & Felony Arson