Welcome to August everybody!  Since we are now getting down to the nitty-gritty, let’s jump right into this month’s Barbie Death Village newsletter.  There will be a final newsletter sent out on or about the 10th.   I want to begin with a few words about the Volunteer Spot.  Please keep volunteering for duties.  This is very important that we have plenty of help so as to not burden the few for the benefit of the many.    If you haven’t either signed up yet or not received a link to the Volunteer Spot, please contact Vulture Chow to access your link.  So what do we need?  We always could use more chili chefs for Monday night, but more importantly look later in the week, say Thursday-Friday-Saturday.  We absolutely need people with gas and propane griddles for the Annual Sunset Red Memorial Pancake Pork-out on Saturday as well as butter and syrup and bacon.  Lots of bacon.  All newbies should pitch in and do at least one MOOP sweep (that would fall under MOOP Patrol).  Also if you have already volunteered please go back and review your spots.  Life gets in the way on the playa and some people have a tendency of overlooking their responsibilities.  Thank you ahead of time for your help.
 
A quick word on the art cars.  They are currently in Fernley/Dayton and Drew and his crew have worked diligently throughout the spring and summer to get them (comparatively speaking) playa ready.  But one obstacle remains:  On Wednesday and/or Thursday we will need people to help pack up and secure the art cars.  The aforementioned Drew will be there, but three or four other people to help would certainly make life easier.  And besides, everyone wants to ride on the mutant vehicles, right?  Well, let it be known that those who actually have helped restore them to their pre-playafied greatness will always get priority seating.  We do have drivers to haul them to the playa, and I want to thank Jon who will be hauling The Cloud Car and Danger who will be hauling out the Barbie House, but they will need help.  Please, if you’re in Northern Nevada on your way to the playa, we need your support.  Let Drew know you can help.  Speaking of towing and saying “Thank you”, I’d also like to give a shout out to Jim McAlister for towing the silver trailer and to Richard Neuman for towing the flatbed trailer.  We cannot thank all of you enough.
 
In real estate they call it “location, location, location”.  On the playa they call it “You’ll get what we give you and like it.”  And like it we do.  Our location this year is at 4:00 and Eulogy stretching to Genuflect.  However the rest of the Village will be moving towards 3:45, away from Center Camp.  This is probably a blessing as Artica, the kiosks where we can buy ice, will be located at 3:00, so that is good. 
 
Which brings us to placement and space requests.  Everyone in our Village needs to be placed in a sub-camp.  Several are already full including Cantina Vida and Barbie Death Camp itself.  If you haven’t yet requested space—and it is incumbent upon you to ask, she will not do it for you—contact Julia immediately otherwise you will be placed, well, who knows where.  Probably Loose Nutz.  We would much rather have you in a smaller defined sub-camp than not, so if you are with a group of unplaced or displaced people, you can form your own sub-camp and Julia will be happy to not only place you but have you prominently displayed on the Village map so you can actually be found.  This assumes, of course, that you in fact want to be found.  But I digress.  Even though the BMOrg has allotted us 3.6 acres of prime playa real estate, this is 12% less space than we had last year and because of road frontage, areas set aside for the shower, camp “hospitality” sector, and the roads inside the Village itself, we will be packed in very tight.  Please do not request any more space than you need.  To quote Governor Moonbeam, “Lower your expectations.”  The BMOrg isn’t giving us any more space, so we’ll have to tighten our belts somewhat.  Please do whatever you can to conserve space.  There really isn’t as much as you might think.
 
Let’s talk tickets.  Our in-village ticket exchange program is still operating.  I want to personally thank Chris for taking on this often thankless task.  There almost certainly will be a few more tickets come trickling through in the next two weeks, so if you’re still looking for a ticket and presuming your dues are paid, make sure Chris knows and we’ll try and help you out.  This is also the go-to addy if you need to sell a ticket or vehicle pass as well.  People who haven’t paid camp dues because “…I’m waiting to get a ticket…” have the absolutely lowest priority on snagging a ticket through us.  We always take care of dues-paying campmates first.  And candidly, we really don’t take care of non-dues-paying campmates at all.
 
Speaking of dues, if you haven’t already paid them, for veterans to our camp they run $150 and for newbies $200.  Foreigners coming in from overseas please add an additional $50.  You can use our preferred method of PayPal to the go-to addy or snail mail to Doc Pyro.
 
Now on to Work Access Passes (the old “early arrival passes”).   Felony and I have been in contact with our placers and it looks like we will be receiving all of the passes we need.  We would like you to be able to print them out yourselves (having the link on your phone will not work) so we need your email address that matches the Burner Profile.  You can send it to Felony.  You will then in a few weeks get an email and a code to print your pass.  Please do not ignore this.  Give Felony your email addy and arrival preference.  Otherwise you run the real risk of not getting a WAP.   If you would like a WAP for either Friday or Saturday and have not yet signed up and are able to remain on the playa until Monday to help clean up we should be able to accommodate you.  Just let me know ASAP.
 
Which segues nicely to this: If you have a WAP and are heading to the playa from Northern California, you may want to consider joining the caravan we have on Saturday, August 26.  We will be leaving from Newcastle/Auburn at 8:00 a.m. meeting up at the Boreal Ridge Rest Area (CA exit 176) at 9:15 a.m.  At 9:30 sharp we’ll take off stopping off at the Golden Gate/USA Parkway Gas Station (NV exit 32) for gas around 11:00.  This takes us about 15 minutes and then we’re off to Nixon for Indian Tacos.  We are considering trying the Indian Tacos at the Nixon Store rather than Oasis 29.  From there it’s onto Empire/Gerlach and we should be on the playa by 3:00, weather and traffic permitting.
 
I want to thank Rob and Yvonne once again as they have offered to use their property in Ophir/Auburn as the staging area to keep our silver trailer with our sofas and our flatbed trailer.  We will be asking for volunteers to help unload the storage shed in Newcastle, probably the week of August 12-18.  We need to empty all of the planks of Barbies, ice chests, shade structures, tables, and general infrastructure. If we have say six of us the job can be done in about an hour as long as we have the vehicles to carry the load.   Anyone who can offer their services would be most appreciated.
 
Everybody knows Barbie Death Village is the lap of luxury, especially by Burning Man standards.  One thing that sets us apart from other camps is our garbage disposal service.  Wildman has it up and running again this year.  For the uninitiated, here is how it works:  Wildman hauls out an 18-yard container and into it we can throw all of our used trash.  This way you don’t have to “pack it in, pack it out” yourself.  The 30-gallon trash bags will run you $5 for one or three for $10.  Please take advantage of this terrific perk.  But please, do not throw your—and I am not kidding—human waste into the garbage bin.  And all personal trash must be placed in one of our specially-marked bags for recycling.
 
As a public service we like to provide the best and least expensive places to buy gasoline before hitting the playa.  Unless you’re coming in very early or very late, avoid Empire and Gerlach like the plague; Nixon isn’t much better.  As of this writing, coming from the north on CA 299, bypass Alturas and instead head into Cedarville (about 23 miles down the road).  The Rabbit Traxx station has regular for $2.59.  If you’re coming in from the west on I-80 the Golden Gate station on USA Parkway (NV exit 32) has regular for $2.55.  Coming in from the east in Fernley the Flying J right off of I-80 has regular for $2.45.   If you wait until you hit Wadsworth on NV route 447 it will run you $2.68.
 
I would like to step back for a moment and address a problem most camps wished they had and that is shower etiquette.  As you know, Wildman has designed and built a terrific shower for Barbie Death Village and it works beautifully.  But that leads to a problem we always seem to have:  water conservation.  The shower runs electrically and we supply over 500+ gallons of water.  (Your camp dues at work!)  You will still need to fill a bucket that holds no more than two gallons of water (three if you’re “showering with a friend”).  We need the water to last the entire week so please do not use more than the allotted amount and we ask that you recycle your clean cooler water (melted ice used to keep beer and soda cold, for example) as best you can.  Frank has contracted for us to have two pump-outs, one Wednesday and one on Saturday.  If you feel the need to pour your personal shower water into the holding tank, please make sure it does not overflow.  Using your excess water as “dust abatement” is another alternative.
 
Make sure to mark your calendars for our Pre-Playa-Party at my home in Newcastle on Saturday, August 19.  This is open to all burners, not just Barbiebarians.  The party kicks off at 12 noon and winds down at 6:00 p.m.  The start time is earlier than previously announced.  We will be loading up the trailer with everything we hauled out of storage like the piano, shade structures, Barbie gallows, and anything else we can cram on.  Then we kick back for a barbeque with hamburgers and beer.  The pool will be open and this is a family event.  A splendid time is guarantee for all.  Please RSVP if you can make it.
 
For those of you who will be arriving early Vulture Chow and Graidawg will be your hosts Saturday afternoon, August 26 at 1:00 p.m. when we will have a guest speaker from the Bureau of Erotic Discourse.  They have spent the last several years giving discussions raising awareness with regards to sexual communication.  They will be going over the ins-and-outs of sex on the playa, negotiating consent along with other fun, adult topics.  We will learn important skills critical to the safety of our guests including, but by no means limited to, how to recognize bad situations and intervene with grace and humor, how to support someone who has been assaulted, and how to find help when needed.  This does indeed look like time well spent.
 
I’d like to welcome all of our newbies to Barbie Death Village!  Joining Haley from San Francisco we have Kevin ; joining Cleopatra Jones there’s Christy Love 415 ; from Russia say “bo-zheh moy” to Tim ; with Barbie Day Spa welcome aboard Laura , Rolito , and Katherine ; from Sacramento veteran burner Christina ; joining Pizza Cats is Linda , from L.A. Kien , and from NYC both Retta and Deseret ; with Brazildo and Papa Smurf welcome from New Zealand by way of Ireland Sue , also Kat , and Pony ; with Bucket in the newly-formed sub-camp Beanstalk we have Michael, Charlie , Clifton , and Jordan ; joining KC and A Playa Home Companion veteran Lamplighters Mahela and Willow ; with Chantelle from New Zealand say “Good day, mate” to Dave , Andre , and Mikyla ; with Wildman let’s give a shout-out to Lynette ; with Paul welcome aboard Molly ; joining Flash from D.C. we have Monica and from NYC Asif ; joining A Playa Home Companion welcome veterans from San Francisco Anna , from NYC Briana , from L.A. Shelby , and from D.C. Lyla Misa is bringing along four burners from the Czech Republic: Daniel , Magdalena B. , Magdalena L. , and Sarka . 
 
To see the old newsletters or just what’s been happening since you last sobered up, check out our website at http://barbiedeathcamp.com and like us on Facebook https://facebook.com/barbiedeathvillage.
 
The Man burns in 32 days )’(
 
Respectfully submitted,
 
Doc Pyro & Felony Arson